Blaze Rockman – Inspirational Speaker

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Blaze has been an inspirational speaker for 15 years having learned to overcome his problems and achieve maximum greatness. With a mix of spoken word poetry, hip hop and magic tricks, Blaze will rock some life-changing advice into your kids. His elementary school extravaganza and holistic self-journey sing-a-long inspires children from all walks of life to strive for greatness and grab a hold of the golden ring.

Blaze teaches by using his own life experiences. He’ll tell about his obsession with setting fires to empty warehouses in Boston, about being arrested on money laundering charges, how he broke out of prison and held a family hostage for 3 days until being shot with a stun grenade. He’s here to teach your kids how they can overcome their problems, any obstacle and achieve their dreams!

Nothing inspires a child more than watching Blaze’s world-renowned puppet show that tells the story of his 6-month meth binge in Thailand. How he accidentally joined ISIS and was arrested on terrorist charges. Escaping jail yet again, robbed a bank, stole an elephant and rode it to Cambodia where he started a cult and massed arms to lead a rebellion against the corporate elite. After a gun battle with Cambodian government, he weaned himself off of meth, went on a year-long LSD binge, saw the face of God and got his life together!

He’ll teach your kids about life’s ups and downs. How he had a small relapse with prostitution and child smuggling but then got his life back together yet again and form the fastest growing internet security firm! Only to lose it by inflating stock prices and stealing money from the company. Did that stop Blaze? No! He got himself back together yet again by sailing around the world attacking oil ships with pirates and learning to love himself. Just like he’ll teach your kids to do.

After the end of the lecture, Blaze will talk about a great new investment opportunity that the parents should really be excited about.

*No sudden movements around Blaze, do not look him directly in the eyes and by court order he is not allowed to be in a room alone with a child.

Blaze Rockman Inspirational Speaker!

In the Event of Global Catastrophe, Stick Head Between Legs and Thank Yourself for Using GloboRescue Inc!

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imgresDo you lie awake at night wondering when the world will end? Will you be chosen for the Rapture? What if robots start a nuclear war? Could you really survive in a Mad Max post-apocalyptic desert landscape and successfully pull off the mohawk and leather look? I’ve got two words for you… You can’t!

GloboRescue Inc. is a worldwide organization who’s goal is to rescue you in the event of a total global catastrophe. How can we pull it off? With a team of super-trained elite ex-army soldiers stationed in strategic locations around the world just waiting to save you. That’s right.. you! Whether by jetpack, rocket ship or submarine, they’ll come to where you are and take you back to one of our super-secret bunker/resorts*. How will they find you? With our patented super-secret satellite technology.**

So we’re here to give you an introductory offer of just $2000/month. That’s right $2000 a month! For peace mind, I’d say it’s worth it. For a mere $2000/month plus a few startup/connection/legal fees not exceeding $4000.00 you can rest assured that if the world were to end, GloboRescue will be there to save you.

So when those aliens attack or zombies try to break down your door to eat your brains, or a meteor the size of Texas hits the Earth… stay calm. Just wait, we’ll be right there.*** We promise. We’re GloboRescue Inc.

*Clients cannot visit or see bunker/resort due to super-secretness of locations.
** Clients cannot see information on our super-secret satellites because of secretness and hi-techishnous of technology.
*** Results may vary.

How to Make a Million Dollars, The Chester Hatfield Way!

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Are bills getting you down? Hate your job? Tired of eating Ramen noodles for breakfast? Well I’ve got some great news for you. I know a way to make tons of cash, fast and easy. I’m living proof. In fact, I took a shower today and dried myself off with a pile of $1000 bills. Why? Because I’m crazy… crazy with money!

What if I were to tell you that you can make a million dollars? It’s true… and all you have to do is tell people that you know how to make a million dollars… You’re looking unconvinced. But trust me. It’s easy. Buy my book and DVD for $179.99, and learn my method and you’ll be sitting back on an undisclosed beach watching the money pour right in.

Why should you buy my DVD and book for the low, low price of $179.99? Because in it is a secret that no one wants you to know. Only I possess it, and I want to give it to you… for the low, low price of $179.99. All you need is the courage to take charge of your life and convince others that you know a secret way to make a million dollars.

You might be thinking, gee Chester, I don’t know a secret way to make a million dollars. That’s the beauty of my plan; you don’t have to know how to make a million dollars to make a million dollars!

This is what you’ll get for your money:
1. An instructional book to sell as your own, “How to Make A Million Dollars The _______ _______ Way!”
2. A pre-written ad for newspapers describing what you’re offering. With exciting phrases like, “Are bills getting you down?”, “Crazy with Money!” and “This is what you’ll get for your money:”
3. An instructional video that teaches you where to find agreeable mindless models that will act like they love your product.
4. Tips on which maniacal greasy-hair look works best with what desperate gullible demographic.
5. Steps on how to look into the camera and act like your just about to achieve orgasm, yet still point to a yacht that you don’t even own!

I’m telling you folks, you’re missing out if you don’t act now. For just $179.99 you can change your life. Come on! Start Making Money the Chester Hatfield Way!