Transformus Festival Newsletter

News

Dear Citizens of Mysteria,

Our fair and temporary city of Mysteria is an experiment in community building and social alternatives. We practice radical inclusion and respect the benefits of diversity. Therefore before we drop acid and burn things there are a few issues that will need to be addressed.

1.  Our leader Hypothesis would like to say that all playa names are trademarked in the City of Mysteria so the guy who says he’s also Hypothesis is in a Mysteria trademark violation and may not be able to join in the real Hypothesis’ drum circle. Also, ThunderKat would like people to stop calling him by his other name Burt. Sorry about that Burt.

2.  Psychedelic Hayride, the Mysteria Mass Transit system, like any other transit system, cannot guarantee on-time arrivals or that you’ll end up anywhere close to where you ask to go.

3.  Also your Mysteria 2012 1070-D Tax forms are due in two months. Remember you can no longer write off shroom or Xstacy purchases. Glow sticks are acceptable up to $100.

4. In other news, The theme camp ‘Crackhead Hippie Beaters’ claims that they were not being included in the town of Mysteria. We would like to re-emphathize our policy of radical inclusion, but we have decided that their ‘Fecal Art’ is not really art and cannot be used as a gift in Mysteria’s gift economy.

5. Last and not least, the Transformus Census Bureau will be returning to conduct a new on-site census of Mysteria because last year’s team wrote down “Aren’t we’re all just like one, man.” Which is spiritually poignant, but in the end, completely worthless.

Okay guys, let’s make this burn the best one yet!